I'm a bit detached from my pagan path, contraditory it may sound, living in a rural area now. I just can't properly focus to celebrate the sabbaths, esbats, etc. And it makes me a bit frustrated. But living at my in-laws', I don't feel comfortable to have my altar in the room we're sleeping in. Too much of people coming in and out of it, besides the cats and dogs that try to lay down on our borrowed bed, and the space is always a little messy. Summoning it up, my only connection time now is at night, when I say my prayer with Lucas, and when I walk alone along our favorite path.
I'm longing to, as soon as we move to our own home, to create my sacred space and feel connected with the gods once again. I just love to be surrounded by special things that remind me of the Goddess, so I guess I'll have to simply wait. That's what I call an exercise to my notorious impatience and anxiety, I'm learning to control them a great lot!! Have you ever felt the same way?
I even messed up the sabbaths. I was with my mind on Samhain, when of course, we're going to have Mabon here in Brazil! No comments...
6 comentários:
Oh, this would be so hard. Definitely an exercise in patience. I would be going insane without any privacy; peace and quiet and personal space are essential to my state of mind! But it can't be long now-- your house is coming along beautifully, (The roof shingles are just lovely-- did you know a roof with shingles like that here is an expensive luxury?)and hopefully soon you'll be at the point where it's time for finishing touches and then the moving in can begin! Hang in there!
Aww. Hope you get to celebrate how you want to soon! I understand the discomfort of haveing an alter where it can be disturbed so easliy. That's why I don't have one. Maybe in our new house. We will most likely be moving soon! =D
I think you can celebrate just by being outside. Maybe you and Lucas could find a few stones outside and do a 4-point placement of a circle then move them when you are done. You could collect some items for an offering as well like food and drink and bury it or place it somewhere as an offering to the Gods.
I'm the absolute worst at celebrating sabbats. Since I grew up as a non-practicing Catholic, it's hard to suddenly celebrate religious holidays for me. I'm hoping the birth of my daughter will change that--you know, that desire to give your children traditions.
Rest assured that the gods understand! I have list of alternative Sabbat celebrations. I'll try to post that today. It can at least help in the meantime...
I love reading about your pagan beliefs.
Hang in there, soon you'll be in your own home and setting up your own altar...please show pics when you do!
As you know, we were changed by our move. I read once that all you need is your inner space... but easier said thatn done. I went to special places but now it is all in my head - though my beliefs are not in line with typical paganism.
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