Wednesday, February 18, 2009

About the school

Yes, here I am again, talking about Lucas' school!! :o)

I decided posting about his progress after reading Boho's and Holly's sweet comments. First, thanks Boho Mom for sharing what you did with your hatchling for her to feel better away from you! You know, we have something similar at home: there are two things he carries with him at school: a "courage sword" kept in his bag, that we remake every year at Full Moon. I started this when he first went to school three years ago to give him some strenght. He draw a little sword on a sheet of paper, and we consecrated it at a Full Moon ritual. Every year, we burn the old one and m ake a new one for him to carry, and this year it wasn't different. He likes to know it is there.

He also carries a little bull's eye stone on his trouser's pocket, it's already a bit wasted, but he loves it. This year he included one more item that he carries in his hands all the time now when at school. It's this little King Arthur dool Kelli made for him:

I'm afraid that soon he'll have to carry an extra bag only for his little encouraging stuff! ;)

Holly wisely pointed out (as always!) about how important it is that the teacher gives him some helper tasks to make him feel important. Yes, my friend, thankfully she does it! He loves taking homework papers to the copy room to make his little colleagues' copies! The school routine here is a bit different from U.S., though: it starts here at 12:30am (so he needs to have lunch at 10:30am so I get him to have shower and be dressed up until 11:30am, shen the microbus picks us up!) and ends up at 4:45pm. The problem is at the entrance. When the bell rings announcing the start of the classes, he starts crying and wants me to stay with him at the classroom.

This week things are a little better, as we are always talking about how the following day routine will be, so he knows how his afternoon will be. The crying time is shorter and I no longer stay at the room (I was firm on this). Today, I left him with the teacher in the begining of the class, explaining I had to go to the bank and other places. He almost lost control of himself, but with gentle guidance I got him to calm down and wave me byebye after being sure I'd be back soon. I need to make all the adaptation at a slow pace, very gradually, it's really his weakest point. He's so independent in the other aspects of his life, but about school it has always been like that.

The shitty (sorry) thing is that on Saturday starts Carnaval, and so the whole next week the school will be closed (as well as the rest of Brazilian commercial life, actually...). It probably means that, in two weeks, he'll go through all the adaptation stress again after being away for an entire week... Arght!

BUT even, or because of, the turtle steps we're making, we'll be able to move on to the next level, like a game, as I explained to him - and he accpeted it as a good metaphor.

I promise that next time I'll only talk about the house ad how great it is becoming, with photos!!!! LOL

5 comentários:

Tori said...

I'm glad things are getting better! I can't wait to see more of the house, but you know we all love hearing about Lucas! A child is probably the most important thing in their mother's life. =)

Anonymous said...

My heart goes out to Lucas. Poor little guy. I wonder why school creates so much anxiety for him.

Although I guess it really isn't school, its the separation from you that is upsetting to him. It sounds to me like you are doing all sorts of wonderful and encouraging things to help him with this situation.

I wonder if it would help to give him a picture to add to his courage collection (like the one of you & Rodrigo hugging you posted a little while back) and write on it something like "Know that we are thinking of you and we love you." Then he could pull it out to see you and have that encouragement whenever he needed it.

I'm sure this situation must be just as hard on you as it is on him, only in a different way. Just know and never doubt that you are a FANTASTIC mom and are doing a wonderful job of loving and encouraging your son. Sending you lots of love and supportive hugs!

Anonymous said...

I love hearing about Lucas's adjustment to school. Turtle steps will get him're very wise.
I love his little King Arthur doll - so cute!
I was the worst at leaving my daughter when she started school. I would leave and then walk around the building to look in the windows to see if she was ok. I'm sure the teachers thought I was crazy, but I didn't care.
We do what we need to as mothers...and you are doing fantastic!!!

Olde Dame Penniwig said...

After a break in the routine, like Carnival, it seems the classrooms all go back to ground zero, everything has to be relearned and everyone is on edge for several days.

Is there any other child in his classroom also suffering from anxiety? If so, then you can tell Lucas, during the Carnival break, that he has an important job to help the other child not be scared. I would do this when I taught first grade. A child fearful of something would be paired up with ANOTHER fearful child, each thinking they were to help the other, and both would put aside some of their own fear. I hope the teacher will help with this, it sounds like she is a reasonable teacher, thank goodness.

Can't wait to see the house progress. Don't feel bad that you are talking alot about Lucas and his school fears, of course this is biggest in your mind and heart!!! One more thing, can you draw on his hand with an ink pen? A little smile face or something, and tell him, whenever he peeks at it, to know you are nearby or that you will soon be there.

Kelli said...

Oh, Nydia, how it warms my heart to know that little Arthur is helping Lucas during his days.
Please give him a big hug from me!